Just saw a man in a wheel chair using his feet to push himself backwards through a crosswalk... good morning Atlanta
i can't believe i brushed your teeth last night. so drunk.
Just learned how to deliver a baby.the things i saw tonight can never be unseen
Oh my god, I hid a wine bottle in my boot.
I don't appreciate the fact that you tagged me as a giant bucket Miracle Whip.
Although, I did get to see a Raiders fan and his toothless girlfriend get roughed up by the police and dragged out of the stadium. So the night wasn't a total loss.
Fortunately for myself I'm twice as smart and half as drunk as everyone else. All things considered I'm leaving here three-to-five times richer than when I arrived.
I just got a reminder alert on my phone for an event I titled "Bradley getting stupid high with me in bed." I assume we planned this during the party. I'm down if you are.
The doctor basically called me a dirty dick.
Mmm vodka always tastes better when i know i have work at 8am
Well that's very sweet of you. I have a strange feeling you're going to regret this when you sober up.
NO REGRETS FUCK DA POLICE
she has no right to get mad at us for drinking during the wedding. she's the one that chose the bridesmaid dresses with pockets.
I had to ask my mom to look for my kegle ball...
Eventually I will start sleeping with people who actually want to hangout with me the next day... But not today
I have a mild substance abuse problem, but I'm still a functioning member of society. America.
Randomize
