Just met a synchronized swimmer, can you imagine the things she could do in the water
Legs for days
Harpoon that
I sk at the spereo and my dad gave me and all access pass
what???
AN ALL ACCESS PASSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS
I think she would actually eat a penis if anyone was brave enough to let one near her mouth
I just made princess spaghettios..and I wonder why she broke up with me for not being mature enough.
They were done having sex when I went to the room. They had that look on their faces.
Disappointment?
Hey man sorry, can't talk. I'm already taking risks by ripping the bong on this conference call.
I just woke up eating some beef jerky with my cat. I think she opened the bag for us.
He put crushed up bacon in the joint and now we're listening to the Matilda soundtrack I have no idea what's going on
If there was a bread and water delivery truck id make sweet hungover love with it.
HIS BALLS ARE HEAVEN SENT FROM THE VELVET ANGLES.
Tell me how you feel about belly buttons
She rode my dick so hard I momentarily lost hearing. I guarantee I had the better St Patrick's.
He's talking about feelings now. I don't even know if he came???
Well I hate to admit it but at this point I can successfully say i have been pee'd on by both of my roommates.
Upon further investigation my nipples are bruised and I have teeth marks all over.
Randomize
