check it out our google latitudes are spooning
You know ure stoned when u start thinking about making a bacon smoothie
Dude just bought condoms some sad fuck next to me buying a pregnancy test he gave me a look like he'd pay me millions to switch places
my goal is to not remember how i make a living by 9pm saturday night
uh, 3 redbulls and 400mg of caffeine pills and i still feel like life is in slowmotion..lets not take tranquilizers again.
I gave up trying to understand them years ago. Now I'm just trying to fuck them.
It's like all my brain cells are screaming at me.
I'm dying.
I'll be on pinterest all night planning crafty things to do with my cats in 10 years.
apparently my new 420 ritual is to look at the clock at 4:20 and realize i'm already too high
Woke up this morning naked, wrapped in a bath mat with a wad of singles on the table. I'm calling it a win.
What the hell do I have to give up to manifest a dick
I remember looking at his body and thinking wow you have a body sculpted by Jesus himself. Still not sure if I said that out loud or not
I think I ejaculated my soul out.
Dicks are not precious.
I hate when pretentious people talk bad ab corn dogs
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