He belongs with you like a mcdonalds playground belongs in Chernobyl
You admitted to me in secrecy that you want to jerk off a unicorn.
then again I'm sitting on a tree stump completely naked in the dark listening to some type of glee soundtrack.
She just gave me a free latte.
Correction. She just have you a frothy, creamy path to that vagina.
I vaguely remember chanting "USA" at the pool when we were talking to the Frenchies.
We were pointing at fat people and chanting USA.
There's a stoned dwarf chilling in the basement here. Maybe there are redeemable qualities about this place.
She just locked herself in the bedroom with an unopened bottle of wine and a steak knife. Unfortunately for her fingers, I stopped giving a fuck two hours ago.
Bro, he broke his neck diving into a kiddy pool.
I have words... I can't think of them tho. they keep melting together and forming you and I just want to hump it.
I'm kinda glad you won't be in Vegas tomorrow because you'd make us go streaking or throw dead animals at them.
Sorry this is the worst night of your life and that you're being a baby about it.
It looked like Halloween in bed... BECAUSE HE BIT MY PUSSY AND I BLED ALL OVER THE FUCKING PLACE. THEN HE FELL AND BROKE HIS TOE. AND THEN PASSED OUT WHEN HE SAW ALL OF THE BLOOD.
Only I would get an underage 24 hours before turning 21.
its not much but to go through all that to ask for half a balls worth of money was so stressful
My vagina likes him more than I do, but I’m going to follow her lead and see what happens
Randomize
