i was shrooming and she was sobbing. i was trying to be sympathetic, but i could see the veins working like worms under her skin. and then her face stripped down to the muscle.
what was she crying about?
i wanna say it was the lack of skin on her face but maybe she lost her job.
and that's why he's hiding in the taco suit
I was talking to this girl who was in love with the air force. I was doing decently until I mentioned that the navy actually has more planes. Cockblocked by my knowledge of random trivia again.
She played chubby bunny with our cocks.. She got 4
It's been so long since i rode in a trunk. I'm riding in a trunk btw
There's a questionable stain on Harley's bed...would they have sex on a dog bed?
Yes I hit her with my car. Yes I gave her a ride home. And yes she gave me her number. What's the problem?
bad night - i tried for naughty librarian but could only manage to pull off pissed off barrista.
We just taught the Brazilian how to smoke out of a vuvuzela.
she definitely didn't appreciate it when you justified bringing her home by yelling to me "fat bitches need love too"
in the midst of studying i picked up my capsule full of untouched weed, popped it open, and whispered "soon" into it. midterms man
And also ice skating can blow me. Goodnight, love you!
I barfed on the cat last night. Just wanted to share.
Being single again makes you realize how guys can go from licking your asshole one night to never texting you again
You know you're old when you’re masturbating and you pull your hip
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