I got so high last night I started crying because i couldn't stop thinking about how scary space is
i wish exes would disappear into a world where we never have to deal with them again, and they can just create drama for each other. Then if they wanted to talk to us, they would have to apply to get a "visa" to come back to our world.
he passed out on the stove with a cup in his hand. yes the pictures are hilarious
There are now half chewed girl scout cookies plastered to my windshield. Do you know anything about this?
I'm tired of stuffing my fat into a slutty costume. Next year let's go as homeless girls. Cute ones. In leggings with camel toe.
you had me at cake vodka
His personality is sparkling but nothing beats his ass
This is that think about life weed. Thank god I'm in American lit this semester. I can actually write papers in this vat of introspective stoned.
i just honestly didn't believe you when you said your brother was a fucking clown. ho shit you weren't kidding.
As a courtesy going forward if you could not bang in my house that would be nice
Sooooooo, can scratch getting a pelvic exam by a man dressed as Woody from Toy Story off my list.
You need to write an essay about this experience.
He was even wearing the hat.
I swear to god if you settle for a trump supporting packers fan, I will not acknowledge your children. You're better than that.
Bruh. He just said the words "cyber sex"-is it 1999?
We all just got ice cream, condoms, and toilet paper now were gonna go home and watch movies as a family.
Condoms?
Sometimes you have good days, sometimes m you delete 360 screenshots off your camera roll.
Randomize
