i guess. but if i can salvage this and still somehow see you naked i feel like that's a win
I meant the "stage" gay, Not the "bend me over and call me Gary" gay.
i just walked into thanksgiving and three people in a row asked me who i was. really?
Had a drunk dream about being in a six story taco bell. Oh my god the menu was incredibleeee
She is going down in cock block history. He went in to kiss me and she threw her hand between our faces and yelled "DENIED!"
dont worry about it. i always have emergency bong water with me
At the bar. Madeline and I totally brought our own pitcher from home because they always run out. Hello alcoholism.
... They left for 10 minutes and came back with a lobster he's in the toilet downstairs
it was like lady and the tramp only with a jello shot on the pool table
At least I'm doing lines with a notecard. That counts for something right
He brought her home and fucked her in a gingerbread man costume in a cardboard rapunzel castle. He had a pretty good night.
Not sure how ur night is going, but unless u also saw a naked drunk chick pissing outside i doubt it can top mine
he appreciated my fucking vagina for two hours he can appreciate my honesty
That's why god made go-pro's and tequila
I went to BBQ fest on Wednesday and came home wearing a different shirt, so I think I did some good damage.
Randomize
