"Monday" is guna come over...
but its Thursday?
yeah, but she cant make it.Monday can...so there ya go
Yeah..And after he fingered me, he wiped it on my face and laughed.
ew wtf
I'm shivering and sweating at the same time. Thanks a lot St. Patrick.
So he didn't pull out. And I like flipped out. And the he told me to chill and opened up a drawer full of packs of Plan B and handed me one.......
Hey thanks again for rolling me that blunt necklace. It was amazing.
he had a dikembe mutombo jersey on, was swatting peoples drinks out of their hand and wagging his finger in their face everytime he did it.
So we have also come to the conclusion that slam piece Saturday's are the appropriate follow ups to find a husband Fridays
Thanks for walking over, a conversation about David Bowie's dick as a muppet is exactly what my day was missing.
Drinking ketchup directly out of the bottle does not make it tomato juice.
I've started a list of places i want to drink. To go along with the list of places i want to have sex. Lincoln's log cabin is on both.
You better buy her a motherfucking bunnyrabit to make up for this. And me footsie pajamas for being a cockblock.
I put tequila in my salad dressing yesterday. Step the fuck up.
How is there no taco emoji?! That's some bullshit.
From the bottom of my heart, thanks for never sending me unsolicited dick picks.
I was in the rappers prayer circle. Then they're blunt circle
Randomize
