Well, for starters you dressed up in all Green and kept singing that song from "A Goofy Movie". Then you made us call you Powerline for the rest of the night...needless to say no, you didn't hook up with her
I feel like my life has just been one 21 year long episode of "i shouldn't be alive"
Let's create a 16 and pregnant drinking game
I trust that you have thought of something completely illegal for us to do this weekend.
It was awful. Their identical twins so it was like having sex with Jeff wearing a wig and shaved legs.
A blow job from a tiger shark would still entail less risk to your genitals than having sex with her.
I applaud your efforts, but I have to say it was the bear we encountered that ultimately shut down the entire operation
Tried to make hash outta one of those keurig machines. I don't know why. Maybe the drunkenness, but now I have mushy bud and no ganja
This late night dumpster diving sesh is making my quads cramp up
YOU WORK IN THE US CAPITOL! YOU CANNOT HAVE SEX IN THE BATHROOM!!
Dude, you are totally ruining intern season for me...
You both sound like you need to get shit faced, fight it out, and have makeup sex.
I have to pee in a cup in the morning and they are going to say....you just peed a miller light. I'm going to hang my head in shame and say yes...yes I did.
Dude she is fucking shit up. Her baby would be proud
He was about to go in...and he fell off the bed. Ruined mood!
When we were finished she immediately got up, cut a star out of a piece of paper, colored it gold, taped it to my chest and deemed me the Sheriff of Sex.
Randomize