It's not a real calculator it's a math calculator
One of my students just wrote an essay on how ninjas, like drug addicts, must realize they need help before they can get better...I gave it an A+
But she tried her best to break my penis, so she has a few free passes with me
Last time I get high to write a paper the night before it's due. "Tiny Wings and sexuality" is not an acceptable topic to for a paper. Class in 30 minutes. I'm fucked...
You've been drinking wine and eating bacon all afternoon. HOW IS THAT DOING GOOD?!?!
So I just did the math and everything in this room except the computer and my clothes has been in my vagina
You said that we all need to "head out like a boner through sweatpants and get fucked." Jager night was a success.
You know you're baked when you feel your throat closing up from an allergic reaction to the pecans in the cookie you're eating but you keep eating the damn cookie.
The great part about clubs is that you can fart everywhere and nobody knows! The bad part is I'm on e and i have nobody to fondle.
I wore home his HoHoHo boxers. I've never felt such a connection to an article of clothing.
It is clearly not my fault that you decided studying was more important than trying to bang our hot teacher for an A, so I seized the opportunity.
Did you leave it the depths of Magic Mike's favorite banana hammock?
i just took a huge shit in old main. i think my college bucketlist is finished.
You were on the train yelling, "THIS TRAIN NEEDS TO GO FASTER SO I CAN GO HAVE SEX WITH MY BOYFRIEND!!!"
A respectable fucking: good but like I don't want to get kicked out of my hotel room
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