At Bonnaroo. Just saw a couple emerge from a port-a-potty. Romantic?
I'm seeing double. Its like being in a room full of people
At least they aren't charging us for the broken diving board...
So the bros are yelling at another bro to get that dildo off the roof. And there is indeed a dildo looking object on the roof.
Sorry I missed your call. Have a great morning.
That is a horrible way of saying good morning to someone. You basically reminded me that we did not hook up yesterday. It's bad enough I got to go to work all day with blue balls.
We stayed up until 4:20 AM. The next thing I remember was waking up at 4 PM, like my internal alarm clock knew.
Omg one side of my Labia is asleep. Has that ever happened to you?
You used your chihuahua as a pillow screaming "HE'S A PILLOW AND A PET" and proceeded to puke in the dog bed
Nobody wants to date "Eats Taco Bell Secretly In Her Car" Girl
I can't masturbate without laughing really hard at some point and it's entirely your fault.
I love standing in line at rite aid for 10 minutes being forced to talk to my ex's mom about life while I'm holding nothing but yeast infection cream
its the 14th virginity that counts the most anayways
I woke up with a jacket; in it passport, hockey tickets, sunglasses, credit card, bank transactions
im pretty sure i tried to use axe body spray to cover up the strong urine smell coming from my jeans. im also pretty sure that it didnt work.
it's okay that you two hooked up in the family bathroom at the mall.. i just pray to god you were not making a family in the family bathroom..
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