Could you please tell me why If you were a 21 year old man why you would want to sleep with a girl who has tinkerbell bedding?
She asked if I could convince him so shave that shit off his face so he'll have a snowball's chance in hell of getting laid.
Cute underage boy is in my house.
OH MY GOD. DON'T DO ANYTHING. WHY IS HE IN YOUR HOUSE.
You peed on someones bathroom floor while saying people are rude for not flushing
If you say no to drinking on a Monday then I'm going to take you to the hospital for a MRI
New year means new boundaries for the Brazilian lady.. I'm pretty sure I got wax on my asshole
i got to hold a baby today and i loved it and i want a baby but actually i'm going to make an appointment to get birth control now.
Any recommendations for how to tell your wife about the pics of her 19 yr old sister on a porn site without admitting you were surfing said porn site?
we're in NC now and so far we've smoked a blunt in every state with the exception of Tennessee which we accidentally went to
i've now hooked up with two guys who have tattoos of their sister's names...so that's a reality i have to live with...
Apparently I took a selfie with fried chicken at 2 am....I'm still trying to figure out where I got the chicken. I thought I was making mac & cheese.
I had a spiritual reading tonight and my dead grandmother called me a whore.
I'm bonding with your girlfriend. I like her. We're plotting your demise.
there was a goddamn geisha at house. my dick feels more cultured.
he drank half a bottle of bushmills, stood up to pee over the side, pissed his pants, sat in the puddle on the deck, told me my life goals were stupid and impossible, and wouldn't leave until 5am. by the time I got up at 8 I had 4 texts and 2 fb messages from him. AND HE STILL THINKS IT WENT WELL
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