I think, one-on-one, Paul Rudd could be very threatening in like a REALLY good way.
it's circumsized.
I think this conversation is over.
He came on my chest. Sat back and said "hey it sorta looks like lake michigan!" kill me now...
Don't worry we found her. Somehow she ended up on my roof with 2 bar stools
I'm pretty sure it all started going downhill last night when they suggested I see how much sambuca I could fit in my mouth
You actually went to class. Im eating dry cereal naked and watching bring it on.
Dude she has starbursts in her sports bra. I feel like this is counter productive.
He like walks around to open car doors for me. Has already held my hair while I barf and still likes me. What. Is. Happening.
dude a monday night stripper made you motorboat her. you should get that checked out
Pretty sure I picked a cat up off the street and took him home with me, fed him tuna, then let him go
Get your clothes on you are our DD for the night. The usual three way payment
The world is a different place when I'm actually having sex
Pro: She likes to masturbate to 50 shades of grey. Con: She reads 50 Shades of grey non-ironically.
Soooo you know how I said I was trying to be a rational adult? Well that led to me fucking a rational adult today.
its so awesome dude, its like im a magical unicorn or something
Randomize
