I can tuck mytits in my pants
What do you mean when you say no pre-party sex?
The Masters... another excuse to excessivly start drinking by 1
despite the cops showing up at 8am, pre gaming groundhog day was my idea yet. and by pre gaming, i of course mean getting black out drunk by 7:30am
Currently behind the bar at some asian place, pouring drinks for everyone with a snake around my neck
Um please remind me to tell you what happened tonight. It involves wine, pain killers and firing a handgun in our apartment. Legit might be hiding from the cops this weekend.
The only responsible thing ive done in vegas is shower and that was onky to clean vomit off me
I have too much respect and admiration for my dick to put it into a situation where he could possibly be killed
No talking tonight. Just drinking and puking up memories
Btw "you gettin a workout in" isn't a great gym pickup line. Like no I'm fucking grabbing lunch on my way to class.
He drunk texted me what I think is two snails fucking on a mushroom. Is "you sick bastard" too mild a rejection?
My hookup from last weekend apparently got arrested today... his roommate just tagged me on facebook asking for bail money.
I just want to meet a nice normal guy that doesn't want me to taze him while we have sex. . . . .is that too much to ask for?
Did I turn a man straight...??
Yes!
We got to the hospital and the girls who caused the accident had already added you on facebook.
Randomize
