Hot guy, man whore rep, huge crush, alcohol that will fuck you up. I fail to see how this could go wrong
you went up to him and asked if you could have "friend sex." He looked like a 7 year old on christmas morning
we were going to warn you, but we veto-ed that idea somewhere between "this is the stupidest thing we've ever done" and "let's order a pizza"
apparently I kept yelling at her that I wanted t-Rex sized lines. awesome
We were all singing so you said you were going to play a percussion instrument... the crackers.
I resisted the temptation to hold the cake in one hand to alternate bites with the ruffles I was eating. I decided that might make me look dysfunctional.
I woke up with a black eye, bruised knuckles, wearing women's clothing, in a house I did not recognize, next to a solid 9. Thank you for making 21 special.
I want you to read this conversation tomorrow and be proud of the fact that you taught me how to decipher any drunk message. Good job.
its just been over 12 hours, and i`m dying, don`t know how i`m supposed to survive the holidays sexless
He stood me up and then his cat died. I feel like this is Gods way of saying he's on my side, even after the tequila fiasco.
I would just like to go ahead and accept my slut of the year award.
It's like 10 times better than an Oscar
I love how you sexted me before you told me happy birthday. Thank you.
Just accidentally walked into a parade for Jesus
This conversation went from me banging other women's husbands to learning about baked goods. If that isn't personal growth I don't know what is.
Aww his grandma died? That's sad! No mourning sex!!! That doesn't lead to good things!
Randomize
