i'm three days dirty after drinking 14 hours last night and some other questionable behavior (hula hooping at a large concert, for example) i will just always bring the class. and the sluttiness.
please say your awake. the girl i brought home last night...any idea on a name? she isnt up yet...
I can practically hear my vag and my conscience fighting.
This freshman just ran out of her seat in a 200 person lecture, opened the emergency door and vommed everywhere. Then quietly went back to her seat. $2 Pitchers hit someone hard last night.
see these eyes, they just want to bone and go to sleep.
He pointed at some girls and said "I'm gonna have sex with them girls over there", and disappeared.
I know it's not technically the "Mile High Club" but we def need a name for the airport bathroom. Cuz that just happened.
If the egyptians can build pryamids men can walk on the moon and ron jeremy can sleep with all those bitches then we can finish these three handles of vodka
The extent of "getting it in" was this creepy guy sticking his finger in my bellybutton
It's accurate though. I am legitimately passionate about pickles. I crave pickles the same way I crave sex. It is a deep rooted animalistic need
I'm on the same pooping schedule as a professor I've never had. He now says what's up to me in the hallway
I've seen too many dicks in the past week. I can't do it anymore.
So I pass out narcotics if its a girl?
You were petting a 40 year old man's moustache for 15 minutes
I'm hosting my annual valentine's day party tomorrow with every hookup I've ever had. thoughts on how it will turn out ??
Randomize
