I only have two rules. But i've fotgotten those rules and replaced them w 2 other rules
So there is a chick dressed up in a vagina costume handing out free condoms next to the dude handing out free Bibles and preaching about sin. I love college.
i cant wait for all this BS that is happening with Tiger to happen to Tebow
Girl next to me just ralphed in a bag. Congrats class of 2010
So far we've hooked up on a pool table, on a public bathroom counter and now in a little league baseball dugout. We haven't even made to a house yet.
I was trying to sing daddy wasnt there from austin powers but apparently I was crying and and yelling jibberish...I get to into this shit
Watch the news tonight. They interviewed me about a fire. I was high as balls so it should be entertaining.
I found a lucrative side business - giving rides home to drunk oil executives. Very profitable.
If I had to summarise my weekend I would do so using the words "horrifying romanian moonshine"
I've got a permanent seat at the "Girls who eat their feelings" table this weekend.
GLITTER SLIP N SLIDE MUTHAFUCKAH~
Most desperate stoner moment; dropped our hard earned resin ball in the sand, rinsed it off and then did knife hits in the kitchen cuz we broke our only pipe
I mean metaphorically speaking, maybe we've all fucked on top of a frat house at some point in our lives
It is not a successful senior year unless you show up to campus without pants at least once, right?
Going to the eye doctors drunk makes you feel like your doing a sobriety test! They have to know..
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