so that girl updated her facebook status as "had the worst night ever last night"
um, i could be wrong but i think it might've had something to do with mark drunkenly screaming about her unibrow right in front of her
Contrary to popular belief alot of woman do actually enjoy sucking cock.
Just met someone from Jersey. No fist pumps or jagerbombs. Kind of disappointed...
her tits were misleading. turns out she wasn't cool, smart and funny
You know whats sad? As I walk past the campus daycare i cant help think, look at those drunk mistakes
In my defense it was my birthday and I really wanted to do it.
im proctoring the SATs right now and im still drunk from last night. i really wanna tell these kids that this fucking test doest mean shit and they will just be constantly drunk once in college.
I was going to text him and apologize but I didn't want him to think that meant I approved of him being my niece's booty call.
Nah nah nah the rules are different on st patty day, drink beer or die. It's like the hunger games but blurrier
Male strippers are involved. You are coming
I went eBay shopping last night. Turns out I brought a Viking drinking horn. I can't even be mad.
Spent the majority of my senior year drunk. Graduate of 2011, I think 2011. Probably.
You're not married and none of these idiots are committing to you so whore it up on whore island
Can we go to pirate hooker whore island then
I need to get off of her emotional roller coaster. I've been on it for a fucking year and I've been throwing up the entire time.
He has the fingertips of a God
Randomize
