Yeah....I really appreciate it....I didn't even get it from hooking up....lame, atleast if a girl gets u sick when u r hooking up it was fun in its inception...
You smell like a Billy Joel song
A disheveled girl in front of me just looked down, shrieked, and yelled to the girl next to her "what is this" while pointing at two large white stains near the crotch of her black jeans. I love that Thursdays are weekends, it makes awesome Friday mornings
i just used shampoo as lube. why? because i'm worth it.
Well, technically I had a shirt on, it was just around my waist.
I dont even clean my room anymore .. i drunk proof it for when i come back smashed with a guy
I just watched the lion king for the first time in years. It's like the equivalent of a really good blow job.
She kept telling me to calm down. I was on the floor with my eyes shut, not moving. In levels of calm I was one step above coma patient
Can't keep a straight face around her after she asked me to "make fuck to her."
After what I experienced at 6am this morning, all I can say is chew your noodles thoroughly.
I made out with my former step mother's best friend. Only knew the connection when they both showed up together at the bar.
You know you had a good time when you get the wheelchair treatment in Mexico back to your cruise.
He's a 30 yr old man who voluntarily goes by Stevie and his job title is "Jumbotron Operator". There's a 97.5% chance he lives in his mom's basement. STOP THIS NOW!!!
Honey you are a beautiful woman but I came over to eat your pizza and fuck your brother. And you're out of pizza.
It’s only loud for those who wanna get loud. The bowlers are protected.
Randomize
