Its ok relax. i can tell ur gonna start raggin. talk 2 u next week
take 3 tylenol pm's and try playing basketball.
I drank it, and now my boss keeps hitting me in the face with beams of light.
Tripping at your desk probably isn't the best plan you've had.
you tried to arm wrestle for the title of "mom's favorite son"
Hey guys, just to let you know, I have a boyfriend...so that hookup was kind of a one time thing.
was that a mass text??
he just asked if we wanted to go to an arts and crats club with him tomorrow. every day it becomes harder for me to defend his sexuality
Like I couldn't describe it to you but if they did a lineup of penises i'd be able to pick it out.
When we were finished I asked him how long it had been since he'd cum that hard. He thought really hard for a while before telling me his brain forgot how years worked.
But I did spend part of my morning scrubbing your cum off my grandmothers piano.
apparently they stopped looking at spit swabs under the microscope in bio ever since they found a sperm cell in one students sample
Oh, that was the alley that I ate a pine cone in.
I need to pull it together. I just cried my eyes out to Master Chef Junior.
He may be engaged to someone else, but god damn that was the best 3 hours I've ever spent naked with someone.
why did you put a dildo on the ceiling fan
the dildo had a suction cup and we had a ceiling fan what did you expect?
We were making out on the floor and his 13 year old beagle crawled in between us & just sat there...I got cockblocked by an ancient beagle named Bubba
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