So i decided to deal with the awkwardness of last night by making out with all three of them
I just woke up with the words DO IT on my hand and six beers in my purse.
He smothers me through text. I can't even image what he'd be like in person.
Drunk fuck. Had to tell him that the 5 second rule does not apply when your in the bathroom at the hockey game.
i just licked my manager on accident and i'm freaking out
He fucked a visibly pregnant girl. It doesn't get weirder than that.
Just found out my 21st birthday is on a Wednesday. The possibilities are cheap, as well as endless.
Is buying her a loofah for my house commitment like? I don't wanna give the wrong idea
I want you inside of me and on top of me and under me and behind me
Basically I need you to be like god, just fucking everywhere
If you've ever wanted to get filthy in a Catholic church before 2 on a Wednesday, I might be your guy.
No. Dude. I didn't knoe it eas floibg to move. It's slepprru ixuy!
Wanna know what sucks. Banging the bosses daughter at work and having the boss walk in while you are fucking on his desk. Good day though. Made 6 sales
Dislocated my knee during sex, popped it back in and kept going. Then got simpathy chipotle out of it too.
you were so high you asked for half double stack and half crispy chicken sandwich "welded together" in the wendy's drive through
Is it bad that I like to have a guy to flirt with in every class? I feel like it's excellent motivation: to shave, to shower and to show up.
Randomize
