I hope to God it wasnt poon. That odor was unnatural, it was satanic pussy.
What happened last night?
You soiled yourself again and told everybody that you'd given birth.
i don't even remember going to get food. i think i got gas too.
We left at the same time. You got home three hours after I did and said you got your head stuck in a fence. I can't believe you don't remember this.
there was 12 of us, girls included, shirtless and wielding swords as we bet on rock paper scissors in the middle of the bar. It was like Cinco de Mayo version of the Deer Hunter
Idea for the cake. Joints for candles. Do it.
whose ass print is on the piano?
Finally buying a camera. Missed out on recording a 3way last night. Hindsight. Ugh.
I miss you too. And it was nice meeting your brother while I was mounting you
He said we were over, wrote my name on the condom he left in my car last night and said he'd always keep it in case I came back. It was kind of romantic
I mean she did throw a tantrum because you wouldn't let her suck your dick
I AM STRANGELY AROUSED BY THIS UNEXPECTED DEVELOPMENT AND I AM COMPLETELY OK WITH THIS.
And don't worry, I have a great track record of rallying after a casual midday blackout.
His sister hates me so I took his virginity on her bed
its been well over a year and hes still saying sex with me was epic
Randomize
