STUCK IN CAPS. WANA GET AFTER IT TOMORROW?
DAMN! I hate it when i drunkenly erase all my "sent message" and wake up in the morning and my inbox is full of "WTF?" and "Huh?" messages.
If i see another girl turn you down you should either turn gay or just kill yourself
woke up to moans and hushed"we can't do this with him in here." hope they had a good time
I was worried if he didn't show me his penis, he would kill himself
We smoked a joint and talked about his parent's divorce. It was like being fifteen all over again.
I am scared. I picture you doing a keg stand on a sinking ship with hula girls cheering you on. Please text me when you get back to shore...or now would be good
She's either too fat to type, hammered or has terrible spelling.
get back quick. that 17 year old who peed on your car wants to do shots.
Dude, you went to another fraternity's formal as a joke and came home with one of their dates. AND you managed to get her number. Please explain to me how that's not a good night.
Also, you need to stop getting hammered and taking showers with people.
She was about to leave with you until you started singing "You Hoes Ain't Loyal" in her face
Does having sex in an airport bathroom with a girl you just met at the bar count as the mile high club? ...no?
Don’t worry I was with my ex husband for 10 years and he could never remember the year I was born, when our dating anniversary was or what year I graduated high school. But I still know that mother fuckers SSN lol
If I hear that song one more time I will drive to hell and make John Lennon eat my ass.
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