this girl literally referred to her butthole as her "back pussy"
found out this morning via facebook that the guy i met last night has a wife and a baby and he took me to his apartment where he takes girls to cheat on his wife
i mean you met him at the daytona 500
My vagina is scared and excited at the same time. It might not be able to sleep tonight.
and you wish you could be eating a cookie right now. but all you get to eat is a penis
Is it sad that I just used my electrical knowledge to not only fix but improve my vibrator?
I'm the brains and you're the boobs of this operation.
You don't understand, we were on a waffle house. Both of us were absolutely certain we passed out at his place then BAM! Waffle house.
Well I can cross being naked in a minivan off the list
I don't care that you had sex on my bed. I care that you used my lollipop condom. I was saving that for a special occasion
It was a special occasion. Your best friend had crazy awesome sex on your bed. Thank you
He also complimented my butt. High praise coming from a boob guy.
I'm glad there seems to be a general consensus regarding your ass
WHY WOULD YOU SWIPE RIGHT???!!!!!
The same reason I ordered and ate almost an entire pizza last night
i want george washington to fuck me as hard as he can holy shit
His favorite positions involve choking me out. I'm marrying him.
The weekend was a blur. There was vodka and penises and orgasms. I played a game of Cock Roulette and won big
We're hate flirting, damnit.
Randomize
