just a forewarning-if you come home and hang out with your stupid girlfriend the entire time that you are here/fail to get wasted with us i will wish either death upon you or that you truly do turn gay when you return to the navy.
New. Vanessa hudgens nude pics
That text made me feel like i signed up for some awesome celeb nude pic reminder
Also, on a completely related note, just came up with an awesome business plan. You in?
you didnt remember my name all night. you kept referring to me as "the blonde with the fat ass"
I feel like if Miami and New Jersey fucked each other and produced a baby that would summarize the bar I'm in.
Just fucked in a kitchen. I never want my penis that close to knives, stoves, or blenders ever again.
Not a clue. But I did find out that his penis has a British accent.
Even dream me is a champ at smoking weed
I hat to flip my "days since last bad decision" chart back to zero. So...yeah. Sigh.
I'm fucking a man old enough to be my father who is also dating my boss. What have you done with your life?
I'm basically your average "grandpa stuck in a 28 year old woman's body" - i'm super passionate about retirement and crossing on the walk signal.
and SLEEP god I love sleep
Finally had sex in the new kitchen. Burnt the hamburgers and hit myself in the face with the freezer door. Worth it.
I can see your house from here
Get off of his fucking roof
My disapointment is making my balls hurt :(
So you broke your ribs while fucking? Dude you just got about 25% hotter.
I fought off a bull with my bare hands while he went off to have sex with her against a wall. I’m more upset about the fact that no one is acknowledging what I did.
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