Ah I wish I was there to nurse you then clean up your piss-filled water bottles
for some reason the bedside piss missed the water bottle today
We had sex on my friends waterbed ..after that the whole school kept asking him if he had fun getting "sea-sick" last night.
i stuck my finger in my ass and it felt weird. but you know. it should be different when a guy does it right?
at the topless march for equality..and wow.not all these boobs should be treated equally
He made me stop in the middle of giving him a blowjob so he could go get his glasses. because he "wanted to see". I need to stop dating nerds.
is that a crab cake on the shelf with the dvd's....?
i feel like the 7 eleven by your house knows our deepest, darkest secrets
Kegstand on crutches, you need to get on my level.
Please be advised that because of last year's "incident" we will no be starting St. Pat's day with spicy breakfast burritos and car bombs. Please plan accordingly.
Halloween is the only night where I would ever end up getting a guy's makeup all over my face
the only thing you said was do the helicopter dick
I mean we don't talk anymore but I still see him around wearing that sweater he stole from me after we had sex
Ok maybe now I get why I'm single I think I just broke a rib pooping
I sat on his face and watched Mean Girls. It was a good date.
I tried to fuck you in my bathroom while my parents were in the next room. I am a clusterfuck of fun.
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