its good for cellulite if you don't wear underwear. its true
I feel miserable, can't drink that much when I go out
We've been saying that since '98
His mom made me a necklace that i am supposed to wear to prom. She included a note with it, which had a star trek quote. What have I gotten myself into?
Do you feel like you missed out a little from not getting crabs in college?
can't decide if i want to get drunk or coked for this harry potter thing.. it is kind of long
aren't you going with children?
Well, what part of "I've heard she has crabs" didn't you take into consideration?
He had a seizure when i was giving him head. for a second i was thinking i was doing a spectacular job
She told me she needed to clarify that we are not fuck buddies, we are best friends that have sex once in a while
Your two fuck buddies playing ping pong together. HOW. ADORABLE!
Found a guy passed out on the coffee table with a thong duct taped from ear to ear.
I'm setting a 12:15 alarm for a taco bell run. Be awake or never wake up again.
He's claiming he can open a beer bottle with anything. He's been trying for a while now with a power rangers action figure and he is just cutting the hell out of his hand. There is blood all over billy
This is like the fourth time this month I've woken up hungover in someone's backyard
The shrooms were awesome. Everyone's bones in their face looked so beautiful! Everyone had great face structures.
Verdict: uncircumcised.
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