bitch asked me if i cared if she kept her snuggie on while we had sex
She's like the little sister I never had ... except for the fact we're having sex.
I made a drinking game out of watching your DUI video, everytime you say " okay, well thats just your opinion"
boobs and vodka. thats all i can remember, finals week needs to stop ending like this..
She insisted on fucking on the futon mattress on the floor, answered the phone call from her boyfriend who was on his way to pick her up, and then had the audacity to ask if I was clean
i had them turn on teen mom at the bar so i wouldnt be tempted to go home and make babies with the guy next to me
Apparently, I kept going on about how i'm going to name my first born Ramen. I think this is a good parenting move.
It's like getting ready for my vaginas own execution
I know that we've never been that tight but I want you to meet my cat before I move.
I found out his moms name, maiden name, profession, and office location, his dads name and profession, his home phone, picture of their house, all of his work profiles, and the cost of their house. All I'm trying to do is find his damn twitter
why is there a wheelchair in the hall and why does it look like we banged in it?
he offered me cocaine within 5 minutes of my arrival. yes of course i'm keeping him
I have already put on my inside pants.
She came into the salon and said, "Don't judge me. Yes that's cum in my hair and I want a shampoo, cut and style."
I put him in the supply closet, used the copy paper to build a fort around him and his wheelchair, then he fucked me in the fort.
Randomize
