your horoscope this morning...very interesting...good luck today
:O -> O: ... that's emoticon for "he threw up in my mouth while we were making out"
Just saw a girl leaving CVS on her bike with a case of beer. She tried to ride one handed with the case under her other arm and fell over off the sidewalk. I'm glad to see someone else's life is a bigger joke than mine.
I'm still reeling over the fact that you beat us all at Risk while you were flat on your ass drunk and falling asleep on South America.
Got a personal ride from safe ride. I was crying so hard. The driver said think of something happy and I said Disney. In which I sang him Aladdin. So I got home ok
Ok so I could say "im sorry"...but instead ill just say "unsupervised...jager...military guys...green school bus called the juice box...and HUGE dick"
We found a swing set....it's in the front yard.
I've reached the point to where my pre-gaming needs to be limited to pre-inning-ing
turns out that the cat the james was trying to catch was a raccoon. call me when you get this, i need an ER buddy
I think shooting the BMW with the bow and arrow is when our group became the evening's antagonist
I still can't believe that I ate McDonald's off of my chest in his bed...
Cross faded me is not the classiest.
No not at all haha I wish there was a picture of that
I thought I would be a proper lady and put my spare panties in a ziplock
I don't think he understands that his kid doesn't bother me. I have a binder full of developmentally appropriate early childhood activities.
Either go for divorced men who are forty plus or stop doing this immediately. You are 23 years old. You need more wine and less baby fever
Oh I fucked him, definitely. We played Strip Halo.
The Dick I got last night was so phenomenal that I had to take a fucking personal day today.
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