My professor really needs to stop abbreviating. I'll never remember what "Fun. Anal. Trade-offs?" means when i study.
Do you ever creep on the girls you have banged and wondered how their walk of shame went?
You don't have to be emotionally available for a blow job.
i swear to god her finding her clit was like looking for a sock in a dryer full of beach towels
Just got arrested at PF changs. Happy New year, China
Yes i believe i did use that word. It culminated in a man wearing a corset thigh highs and stripper shoes. All mine btw.
She gave him HEAD floating down the river in a tube as big a a tire. I just don't know how to compete with that sort of level of slut.
... Already stepped in vomit and got a dirty look from a fat in a neck brace
I am more familiar with your toilet than I ever want to be with any appliance
I'm not liking this ratio of moving to blowjobs...
he told me to take care of him and then he asked me to walk him to his hotel. I already have a pussy. I don't need another one
Whelp, I woke up on the front lawn this morning. I have got to stop wearing these underwear. Every time I do, I end up puking in someone's greenery.
He screamed like a woman when he came then proceeded to sing "you [we] are the champion" by Queen. I think I'm in love.
I just took like 30 condoms from the doctors office... no one can say I don't try to save my money.
Unless my dick prospects improve this year’s Halloween costume will include panties with “DTF” written on them and a push up bra
Randomize
