Is it bad to mix sunny d with vodka if i dont have any real OJ?
I've mixd ketchup with vodka before and called it a bloody mary, so, no.
This girl wants me to lick her pits
pits??
Yeah pits, I think I still go for it though
oh my god. my mom just found my pipe. she thought it was a dildo.
like i said, there should be a sitcom about your family.
hahaha our party bus just died on the freeway and we're drinking in the center divider. i'm on the roof. i win
so my class lasted 15 minutes this morning because this kid puked all over himself..only at radford
I just found out you can file for divorce online. I love America.
I miss seeing your mom and dad at church, well mostly just your mom... She used to hug my face into her boobs.
so literally, as soon as i tripped and fell and hit the floor the earthquake started. hows THAT for a self esteem boost?
I just puked while everyone was releasing balloons. Im to hungover for this memoial service. Rest in peace great gramps.
It's been a long time since I felt this bad on a Monday... and for that, I thank you.
The walk home from the bar is FAR more shameful in daylight.
It's all sex hats and vagina bandages with you isn't it?
I'm getting a car wash man. I am go get a car wash high.
But forealz I'm gonna need a solid 52 orgasms so hydrate.
OMG. When you threw the used condom on your floor you threw it in my purse!!! I just went to grab my headphones and it was stuck to them!
Randomize
