i woke up with socks on this morning
so?
i didnt wear socks last night
The Redheads category on Pornhub is my number 2 site behind facebook on google chrome. I think I have a problem
I never want to see another naked old woman again.
no... you woke up naked next to the toilet because you said your outfit was too cute to throw up in
I should have been more specific when I asked for 8 inches.
i couldnt tell she was wearing a bumpit until she started giving me head
Someone should've told Pope jumper lady and terrorist pants guy that the Worst of 2009 lists already went out....
That's why they call him "the cheesegrater".
I actually had fun getting arrested. That high.
I think I've officially made out with the entire starbucks staff.
I just kept screaming "I'm fucking a preacher's son!" Also, this water tastes like weed.
After arriving 30 minutes late, he slowly walked to his desk and halfway there he just falls over like a tree and passes out. I now have some sort of proof as to how awesome that night was.
You are not going to get a pat on the back from me for not fucking that 40 year old again.
Stay positive! You think people like sad vaginas? NO! You'll get some!
Nothing says I'm doing some sketchy shit like coming out of your bedroom with your underwear inside out
Randomize