i just saw a foot job.
porn is incredible...
wtf someone played my fucking brickbreaker games and lost i had ten fucking lives. ughhh
maybe you did when you were drunk
no way, i wasn't THAT drunk.
i was like a deer caught in headlights with its coke-dick hanging out
its no coincidence her full name and "cling" are the same in t9
Just saw a british exchange student take a flyer for free dental care. Yes.
Are you seriously trying to guilt me into sending you naked pictures by saying "So I can look at them during dialysis" ?
Is it working?
I know it's pride week, but your asshole is just never supposed to taste like banana.
There's a fried egg and an empty bottle of reddiwhip in the parking lot. Did you have fun last night?
at one point he couldn't find his underwear so he put on my catsuit to go to the bathroom
Just don't let me fall on anything that can be broken. Unless its a dick
Don't come. It's not even a party it's a total sausage fest. Like 20 drunk dudes in a bedroom. We can still drink by ourselves though it'll be ok
When I go out tonight I need to make sure to be really good. The Easter bunny doesn't deliver to jail
People trash cargo shorts, but I'm like, sorry I had room for beers and you didn't.
We lost. I'mma go home and drink more and do a face mask and wonder why it is that god put me on this Earth to suffer
Should I be concerned that he called me mom when I got in bed on top of him?
Randomize
