why am i having a flashback about somewhere we were this weekend with music videos playing? Spike jonze brothers place?? Help me out
So i told my advisor i had to drop the class bc the prof said "supposably" and "irregardless" within the 1st 10 minutes of the 1st class; she agreed with me that dropping it was the best choice
I just learned that your liver regrows itself every 2 months. Best news I've heard all week.
my breakfast just consisted of gushers (made with real fruit!) and they're trying to tell me im not eating right?
You were in subway at 3am showing everyone your tan lines
This chick had a microhand. Fucking, like, jerking off a baby carrot would make it look like corn.
is that a sigh of girlish delight, or "sigh...I'm having a herpes outbreak'
Can't it be both?
I just found a piece of squished oatmeal cream pie in my armpit. So very sad.
all i've had to eat today is leftover bday cake and a shot of tequila.
welcome to college.
Just drink your champagne out of a trophy like a fuckin winner
I need water and some morals
woke up and you werent here...its ok if we're never going to speak again but my furry hand cuffs are missing and i would like them back. thanks.
Can you explain the Transformers set up for battle in my living room?
Wow. I hope you were either doing that in your sleep or blacked out. You threw up then covered yourself in duct tape... i wish i got that on camera
We met behind our asshole boss's back with the intent to oust him from the company. If this revolution is a success, bring nachoes.
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