I want to stick my p in your. b.
one word: firstdatebathroomanal
It looked like if robin williams had a vagina
Dear man in the lobby please go play whith yourself elsewhere
You peed for a solid 5 minutes last night and turned around halfway through to give everyone watching a thumbs up
Why is there an empty beer bottle in the shower?
Why wouldn't there be.
I fucked a guy that's in Sports illustrated. I'm officially ready for college.
Let's get weird.
It's 10 am...
I'm assuming that means you're not busy...
These bubbles make my penis feel like it is resting on clouds.
Two days later and my throat is still sore. That bong is a double edged sword.
Better safe and shitfaced than hungover and in need of another surgery.
We need to get me chipped asap
I'll do whatever I want when I'm 80.
If you are still alive at 80 I demand a medical explanation.
I still don’t believe you, the dog DID NOT tear down the shower curtain and shit on the floor.. we found you in the fetal position in the bathroom holding your tequila gun. It was you!
Which one have i been cheating ON and which one have i been cheating WITH if i met them the same night & have been dividing time equally?
Randomize
