Farted during a conference call.SBD. permeated the room people were gonna puke.noone could say anything or leave cus we were on the phone with clients. coworkers were outraged.how I still have a job is beyond me.
she spent the whole night flailing her arms because "primates are the only species who can move their arms like that and we shouldn't waste it"
You made a list of reasons why you should be on fear factor. You came up with 2 reasons: "I like fear" and "I am fear"
How do you not remember?? She kept putting a dollar on her waistband and insisting it was all you can eat under a dollar
You're the third person who's asked me for an afternoon blow connection in one day. Unreal.
That's more of a you-issue than a me-issue
that man is just a bundle of powerful magic and poor judgment
I heard drunk is the new sober. I heard me say that. To a cop. Can you come get me??
My brother just text me asking if I was ready for the blowjob of my life.
Just realized I'm still chewing the same gum post blow job. This Stride shit really has everlasting flavor. They should totally have an ad campaign based on blow jobs.
eh, I feel I'm heading for a breakdown and I need to get it out of the way before I start writing that lab report.
7% of guys ive been with can get me off... I did the math!
My sex life is driven by spite and alcohol
Why can't he just dump me? This is like a baby seal clubbing the hunter
Found my bra in the fridge. See you in 10 mins. It's gonna be a good fuckin day!
Wanna get business drunk and go play golf?
Randomize
