So I'm stoned for 420, and have an eye doctor appointment in fifteen minutes
Are your eyes okay
I mean if I was Asian they would be
But when he came on my stomach I noticed how tan I was!
I fucked her while she was wearing her boyfriends dogtags. I'm officially a bad american
I am watching the CFL at a Hooters in Texarakana. I made a poor life choice at some point that led me here.
New drinking game. Every time Romney and Santorum switch leads, take a shot.
....this is what your political science major is getting you?
I sent him a pic of my tits and he said "Word." I need a drink.
She told me she's into girls now. I told her there would be a full bottle of jäger and an empty bed here Friday.
I think i should wear mittens next time we have sex.
I was wondering why he was in my phone as "Cat Guy", he seemed pretty normal. Then when we woke up he was wearing a shirt with a picture of his cat on it. The name stays.
Is it counter productive to ride on my exercise bike with a cocktail in hand?
I should probably drink beer instead of rum today so I don't end up naked in my living room while I still have guest.
He literally lured me in the house with his cat then we ended up fucking on the living room couch while the cat just sat there and watched
You know darned well I have a well-documented weakness for redheads, Subway and hand-drawn graphic novels.
For someone I see at the bar by herself all the time... I should have know she had a tazer.
HE’S PUKING UP BLOOD
okay all good I mistook strawberita for blood...
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