I dont like him- his parents were home and he hid me in his closet like anne frank
ppl dont tell me stories about anal. apparently im not a tell-me-stories-about-anal kind of person
so apparently i worked out for over an hour last night. drinking is the only way i will ever get anything done
Heading to the gym, the one that guy said he goes to. Already checked online, his class is at 5. And no, this isn't too much after meeting him last night. Stop judging me,
There is a girl on the metro with no shoes and she's using a Crown Royal bag as a purse.
Either I just got hit on by a 10 year old.girl dressed like a boy or I just got hit on by a midget lesbian. Either way I feel uncomfortable
You rubbed your penis on my leg and said "people have paid for this kind of action"
If we're single and alone together, the fuck angels shall sing upon our nude bodies.
Is it possible to be drunk burnt? Like sun burnt but from drinking? Cus I think I that's what it feels like
I just told the joker that my vagina is the bat cave and he needs to infiltrate it.
How many times have we said we'd stop taking Jell-O shots with strangers?
I hate when I wake up and find my vibrator next to me. Such a waste of an orgasm...getting myself off in my sleep and not remembering
congrats on being the token straight people in our group.
We were making fun of some people having sex on the beach, an hour later we were having sex on a golf course
IF YOU DIE ON LSD YOU DIE FOR REAL
Randomize