Dork........ .......... .. . ...... ........... .. . ... ...... .. . .... ..... .. .... ... .......... .... . . ..... Yeah its morse code, no big deal
i get turned down more than a collar. where are the desperate bitches i need to crawl to them
Different chick, same blowjob, same parking lot.
Just lost my virginity while listening to rick astley. torn between horror and jubilation
Me + Nice restaurant + Copious amounts of booze + obscene comments to couples = valentine's day plans
my ass has officially been on the floor of every fraternity on this campus
and who said we didn't have goals?
The guy is drinking 5 bottles of beer in a juice pitcher. Fucking amazing.
I broke my arm trying to do a hand stand in my shower to wash the hate out of my asshole.
Dude, nobody just eats a banana these days. This chick wanted it. She wanted to get down with Charlie Brown.
Just puked in my hallway. Good start to a great night
I think I heard my penis growl. Wanna do lunch?
Just because I also want a blowjob doesn't mean I don't want to just see you too.
We didn't get home until 4 am. Her mom let us in, confessed that she had sex with someone she worked with and said he had a small penis. I love this family.
I'm at the gym. I've taken enough caffeine to feel inspired to be a low budget instagram fitness model. I totally forgot my push up bra though
It was just a hint of nipple. I kept it classy!
Do you even hear yourself?
Randomize