There was an extended period of my adolescent life where my friends and I would get high, drive around in my minivan listening exclusively to the wu tang clan, and intentionally crash into snowbanks
I use a guy for sex and get three minutes out of him. go figure
lets hang out tonight and do stupid stuff.
Dating you for 6 months was stupid enough. But thanks.
just woke up with an anonymous loaf of bred in my bed and a piece in my mouth. this says alot about my life.
I was high enough to understand and function with 'flip' while playing brick breaker
Damn. I don't think I could ever be that high.
I miss vodka workout Fridays
All I'm saying is that she needs to invest in some razors. But her head game is great. The pros and cons in last minute hook-ups
He left his own bachelor party to bring me weed. Then smoked with me. Tell me I'm not his favorite-ex-friends-with-benefits.
Well who could blame her. I would run away from me if I could.
No. If I hated you would get none. Then I would eat them all in front of you and laugh at your tears. Although that hasn't been ruled out for entertainment purposes. Nothing purposeful.
I still have your make up all over the inside of my thighs from the face sitting. Free tonight?
We exchanged spring break stories last night. Open relationships are the best.
I was going to say that I wasn't sure how that happened... but then I remembered that I bonded with the Australians over vitamins and INXS and they bought me tequila.
I found a 9 minute video on my phone of you singing into an eggplant.
So hungover that I might just sit in my car and wait until chipotle opens...in two hours...
Randomize
