she gave him a mild concussion from throwing him against the wall in an attempt to dance with him. gotta love monday nights at the sandbar.
I am now the only person in my apartment who hasn't had sex in my bed.
I figured out plans for New Year's and by figuring out I mean I've got a sugar bowl of cocaine. Start at 10?
Don't linger or you will get sucked into spending the night. Remember the mission mantra: GET OFF
Quick question: how do I take a nice picture of my ass? I'm asking you because I figure with an ass like yours you're probably experienced.
Well going home with a Ralph Lauren model helped me get over him real fuckin' quick. Would recommend it for all women going through breakups
those were not strange pants with a really large waist band...it took me 3 days to realize I was wearing someone's sweater as pants
It's not a real holiday until someone pees on you. Did someone pee on you?
I can feel your movements against the shared wall we are leaning up against. It makes me feel as though we are one. Queue Pocahontas song...
i woke up in a bed of pop tarts
Yeah. We had phone sex then cried together, it was beautiful and heartbreaking
So I met one of her cousins last night. She recognized me as "the guy that's always in the liquor store", I may have a problem.
Is it ok to bone a former patient who is also a client? Since it is two negatives does that cancel and become a positive?
I SHOULD BE TERRIFIED OF HIS DRAGON DICK.
she wouldnt leave because they were playing One Direction. I'm dating a thirteen year old.
Randomize
