they were just spraying pledge on themselves and calling it lemon cologne.
well since you're still married, you will be paying for my abortion right?
I hope he's okay, but I also hope he shows up with an eyepatch
Your cock is gonna weep like a baby
He sent me a picture; erect penis, cat in hand and no pants on. He got a boob pic for that one.
I will pre answer that I did not see it the fun way. He was peeing outside.
so you know how I brush my teeth after I give you a bj? according to my dentist my teeth have never been cleaner. looks like this will be a recurring thing
Koalas always seemed like really high little puppy kittens to me.
I didn't realize how drunk I was until my vagina was in the snow.
Andy was trying to screw his door shut from the inside so no one could get in.
I mean in all honesty I would let James Franco shit on my chest. End of story
Holy Hangover.. I'm marrying whoever put this water by my bed
I'm 10 cats away from completing my post divorce transformation.
I don't want any of this. I just want big sausages.
Sooooooo Your wife and your girlfriend are making cat noises at one another via text
Randomize
