I'm sorry..where i come from learning how to exploit a wealthy middle aged man is a right of passage
just threw up nine times in the shower.. solid night last night.
I submitted an essay to my history teacher comparing changes in the middle ages to the song changes by David Bowie. I can't wait to see my grade on that.
I use him for alcohol and he uses me for sex. This is the closest thing to love i could imagine
just because she threw up on my junk doesnt mean i dont like asians anymore
I woke up to blood crusted on my face. I don't understand
team rage. no explanation necessary
You SHOULD feel empty, we were at the top of our game, and by that i mean snorting things we don't understand and only a few steps away from adultery.
Is this girl REALLY making a smoothie in the bathroom right now?
He's nice but I'm a one bouncer kind of girl
I dealt with the imported moonshine, but when the cocaine came out, I had to get the fuck out of there
Haha. Maybe he's one of those feminine men who fucks like a god then makes you fantastic crepes afterwards
You know the sex was rough when you wake up with a chipped tooth. I have no regrets
You were laying on the floor coloring a "get well soon' card for your liver...
HILY FUCK HES HERE I HAVE MONISTAT IN ME HE SUPRISED ME
Okay I’ll say it... THIS MOVIE FUCKS
That’s probably the first time I've heard Little Women described that way and I love it
Randomize
