whats a positive sounding word for "exploit"?
the only muscles i have these days is kegels
get to allyx's house asap
Ok is everything ok
Yeah, theres just lesbians
omg yes on my way
so exactly what does one wear to an abortion clinic?
she laid there and continued moaning loudly for like 10 minutes after we were done, just so that her mom would be jealous
Making jello shots drunk, i apologize ahead of time if they are too strong Can't taste anything.
His apology was sex and a subway sandwich. Strangely, I'm okay with that.
he was extremely fucked up- he thought my sports bra was his boxers. even when his leg wouldnt fit. at least whiskey dick wasnt a problem
I was the only one at the party that didn't get their name taken by the police. I'm convinced that I'm the main character of Ferris Bueller's Drunken Adventures.
Ps you missed quite a show. I was for some reason whipping my hair back and forth and head butted the tip jar. It shattered and now I have a circular bruise on my forehead. All the bartenders hit the floor to get all the quarters.
He's hitting it raw. Might as well stick his dick in a vat of SARS at this point.
the only thing I remember was some guy took out his fake eye to use it for beer pong
she stuffed her marc jacobs purse full of cereal
classy
His sister gave me the "if you hurt him I will break your neck" talk. I didn't know how to tell her we're not a couple.
Naw dude theres seriously a lobster in my sock drawer. Why?
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