took him home. told him i would rock his world. passed out. a for effort f for follow thru
For a day that started with shitting my pants, things turned out fairly well.
I finally had sex with him last night, but we used a condom so it doesn't add to my number of sexual partners.
See, not all bad decisions involve my penis.
Just say its a British thing. They wont know Its not. And if they say you're not British, proposition them for a post-sex game of cricket.
He blended the pizza with water and drank the whole thing. He is my hangover hero
The only way I can describe the noise he makes when he has an orgasm: dying walrus.
Less than a month to go... I do not understand how I was able to put up with a roommate who wears bright green Crocs for a year.
I just instagramed a picture of an ostrich in case you were wondering what I did with my night
I'm eating your cookies as payment for having to listen to you. Happy sex
He said something last night about making crepes, but after getting pissed on in bed, I question everything.
YOU SLEPT WITH A GUY WHO HAS A BILLBOARD IN HIS HONOR?
I think i got my first booty call. it was like she came to my house. sex. leave.
Congratulations. Welcome to the wonderful world of quick dirty secret sexy time.
thanks... i think. haha
oh i see... well this is a positive first step in you courting him for sex.
we are the best best friends ever. You had sex in an ice cream truck I had sex in a fire truck
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