Is your liver wearing a sombrero yet?
No...more like a life jacket.
The best feeling....farting and having the bubble hit your balls
I just put a condom on my dildo so i wouldng get another uti....most depresIng moment of.my LIFE
I'm pretty sure he jizzed in his pants, and no it wasn't even half as funny as that song.
Skinny jeans should not be made in size 14. Then, it's just a lie.
Just saw an Asian guy riding his razor scooter to class. Dreams do come true
all we ever talk about is how much i like your dick or my drug problem.
So not only did team sweden fail to particpate in any drinking game but i also found puke in my viking helmet this morning.
It took him an hour to realize I wasn't this "Sarah" girl, and by then he was already crying and eating pizza rolls.
it was a frathouse cornucopia of foul mixed drinks and "sangria", which im convinced was blood and pcp
All I know is she walked in crying with a bag of limes and a bottle of tequila and has been locked in her room blasting lil wayne ever since.
I just try to date guys based on what I need like I am trying to find an electrician now
You gays are geniuses
There's cereal in my underwear. Was I in your apartment at any time last night? That's the only logical explanation for this.
It's snowing in May and there was a law school party at the strip club. The end is near.
I haven't had an orgasm since 2014. So you cam see why I'm having a bad year.
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