so that girl updated her facebook status as "had the worst night ever last night"
um, i could be wrong but i think it might've had something to do with mark drunkenly screaming about her unibrow right in front of her
taking shots each time the weatherman says Dont go out in this blizzard
The best was having to tell my 16y/o cuz and her bf that we could see him fingering her in the inner tube. Lucky for them, I'm the cool cousin... and was river-level fuckedup.
There's a litter of kittens in my bathtub and beer cans everywhere. I want my apartment key back.
So did u puke in his bathroom or all over his Olympic medals? Please say medals...
How many weeks is it acceptable until I can start bringing freshman back?
He calls it "his noble steed" and i plan to ride it.
So. Do you think marshmallow vodka in hot chocolate while eating a graham cracker would = s'mores?
In some strange universe, yes
lesson #1 of freshman year: grinding with a sombrero is difficult
Just blew a guy who had the same phone case as me. It was destiny.
I woke up wearing my panties and an eyelash, soo I'd say your birthday was a success.
I know but at least you've never been asked to have sex dressed up like Catwoman
The Easter dress struggle is real
Yep. Just had to pull mine off to puke.
I think every girl deserves a pregnancy scare. Because then it just feels like such a priviledge to be bleeding out of the vagina.
I legit just did a jig towards my box of tampons.
EMERGENCY SUBJECT CHANGE. SHE DOESN'T KNOW.
Randomize
