Strip flip cup NEVER equals good idea
When my kids ask how I lost my virginity Im going to have to tell them of a mythical thing called "Myspace" and how strangers could lure you into their "den of love" thanks to clever quotes and graphics
The more I hate his personality, the more I love his penis.
It's nice to sit in the library and see the progression from freshman pledge to 6th year coke addict all at one table. Gotta love sororities
the teacher just ate a hash brownie and passed out on the bus best field trip 2010'
Shit, I may have left some acid in your bathroom last night. Has he been in there lately.
you know, this Evan Williams whiskey isn't so bad when it's watered down a bit and you're home by yourself on a Saturday listening to Snoop Dog alone in your apartment without pants or any plans for your future...
Is it bad if one of my goals right now is to snort blow through a licorice?
Don't answer that. It is bad.
I just saw a douchebag with frosted tips & a LaCoste polo with popped collar driving a Call of Duty edition Jeep. It was a cavalcade of stereotypes.
He ripped off my pantyhose and all I could think was, "oh no those were clinic-appropriate!" That's what I get for ditching a continuing education meeting to go hook up with my scuba instructor.
I tried to find the bar, ended up at a car dealership. Then the alarms went off.
my friend was passed out in the bathroom so I threw up in the coffee maker, not the pot the water reservoir that kind of drunk.
i turned around and there he was, right in my face. i was mid deep throat of a hot dog that i was eating with my hands and no bun. you win FSU, you win.
I just wanna be euthanized
Thas it
Don't forget to bring $1s for the strippers. Make it rain!!!!
Thanks, mom, will do
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