guess who came home with a hottie last night
Def drugged
Scream out, "Tax-Free dick over here" in the bar. Ladies love tax free stuff
just opened a can of spagetti o's with a butter knife. the things u will do for food when ur stoned.
You know you're hung over when your pose in art class is lying face down on the platform
Just think. Tomorrow you'll wake up, shower, and get your brains fucked out. That's your ice cream. Today is your peas and carrots.
Everytime the frat boy touches his bro's ass after making a cup take a drink
Druken naked yoga : jus another ploy to keep your husbands eye in check
I'm so glad you support me having casual sex with your uncle
Which one of you fucks put a bounty out on my brother's virginity?
Dude, you can't drink while watching Star Trek. You hardly understand it sober.
It's an alien shaped cup though. i think that'll help me absorb.
So vagazzling was a success
ok but bondage is pretty much my easy mode
You don't have to buy me dinner, watch tv or even hang out if you don't want. Just fuck.
That was the most spiritually awakened shit I have ever taken.
I have so much to do, no motivation, and Harry Potter is on. You KNOW whats taking priority in my life right now
Randomize
