it's just weird having a massive boner in the morning when you could have used it the night before.
Also just realized how inappropriate it looks to other drivers to finish bottles of cheap champagne at stoplights
Take your time, they're doing body shots off the dog.
His parents had a bottle of captain morgan on the table for me when I went for dinner. I feel accepted
wanna go with us to feed the ducks bread soaked in vodka?
how could i say no?
Bad idea. College students cannot afford both alcohol and a cat. Unless said cat is irish, and can feed itself with fifths of whisky.
You said "i miss him" not "i miss his dick." You're getting emotionally attatched. Shame.
Denis dont give a fuck, Denis drinks out of straws. Denis disregards the fire station & bought 18 fire hoses so he can fight it himself if the farmhouse is on fire.
At this point, if I'm not getting fucked by a man in ONLY cowboy boots, it's not worth it.
I'd go lesbian for $50 and a good phone case.
By talk him into it I assume you mean blow him into it.
We're trying to make our wedding vows nice but meeting on OkCupid fucks that up entirely.
My only contacts are booty calls or the club hockey team.
If those panties could talk.
"Once upon a time, Jenny got chlamydia from a magician. The end."
I wasn't going to drink. Then there was alcohol so I gave that up.
Randomize
